Friday, October 7, 2016

Since I've Been Gone

You guys, if you don't know what show this is from you're probably a millennial.
Look at what a baby John Travolta was!  So tiny.
Oh, hey there internet.  Long time no see.  That's my fault, really.  Obviously.  I've been MIA for approximately one hundred years at this point.  And you guys, while I'm flattered, you really didn't have to send the paparazzi to try and find me.  I'm still here.  It was such an ordeal getting those photos of me shopping at Target back from People Magazine.  To top it off they sent me a kind of rude letter telling me to stop sending pictures of myself to them since no one cares that I bought toothpaste, storage bins, and kid's clothes because I'm basic and not famous. 
 It's fine. 
I'm over it.
ANYWAY, since I've been gone I've learned a few things in my time away from these parts.  I've learned that I really, really love those Skinny Cow ice cream sandwiches that have the ice cream with the cookie covered in a chocolate layer.  You guys.

I've learned that I no longer care for the PSL (that's Pumpkin Spice Latte for you non-Starbuckers out there).  I don't know what happened, and I'm really sad about it.  I was such a PSL fan, and then come September 1st I took a swig and said, "Nope."  Maybe it's maturity?  I don't know, but I don't like it.
I've learned that I really enjoy wearing a one piece swimsuit, and if that makes me lame I'm totally okay with it.
I've learned that I love a good jumpsuit.  Which, I kind of already knew, but I feel like it needs to be mentioned.  Basically, I enjoy clothing that is a uni-suit.  I like stylish, low-maintenance clothing that you don't have to work hard to put on...because putting on pants and a shirt separately is exhausting, apparently.
I learned that I still love Ingrid Michaelson.  Why is she so fun?!  I just can't get enough of her.
I've learned that no matter what, Jon Bellion will get me through the best and the worst.  If you haven't listened to this, this, or this you should.  He's amazing.  And if you don't like it...well...haters to left, my friend.
I've learned that even though I've read the Harry Potter Series four times, a fifth is just as fulfilling and as promising as the first time I read it.  Especially with this podcast on board.

I've learned and re-learned and re-learned again that my children are phenomenal creatures.  They absolutely amaze me with their bravery, resilience, and hilarity on a daily basis.
I've been reminded that spending time with Dearest is still absolutely one of my most favorite things to do.  He was, is, and will continue to be a good choice for me.  I was especially reminded of this over the last little while.
I've learned that it's okay to go your own way.  It's okay to feel both right and wrong about everything and nothing. 
I've learned that my demons are still alive and well within my spirit, but I've learned that they have a place.  They have a seat at my table, and that is nothing to be ashamed of.  Their place is valid and true, and they teach me something about myself that the angels cannot.  They have taken up too much of my time while I have been away, but I think they are learning their place.  I, in turn, am learning too.
I am sure I will get into some of these lessons as we journey onward; as I continue to learn my way here.
This summer has been immensely joyful and painful for me.  I have watched and felt the forest around me burn to ground, but I can feel the richness of the soil of my soul beneath me as I move on.  Getting knocked down never feels good, and sometimes getting up feels even worse.  But as I stand here, I can tell you that I am deeply thankful for that pain. 
I needed it.  It was warranted.  It brings me such peace that I cannot even describe.
It makes me better.  It makes me stronger.  It makes me more me.  I am always thankful for any lesson, no matter the pain, that affords me those gifts.
So, here I go.

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